I summon up the power of banana clan*

Alrighty, time for some pics and some words about

Witness the Thanksgiving Fitness '07!

Per usual, it started the weekend before, what with the grocery shopping, and early food prep (baked goods can often be made several days ahead of time. I made 3 kinds of muffins, for instance, in one fell swoop Sunday night. Bran-raspberry jam, Apple-Cheddar-Bacon, and PB&J). Wednesday night, with the epic bike crash, was not an auspicious beginning to the official festivities, but it didn't hold up the cooking much since I had so many willing bodies to help me out. We cooked late into the night.

Thursday morning dawned not-particularly-early. Roomie D made his famous egg-bake dish to tide us all over whilst we labored away. He prepared a turkey à la St. Alton Brown, and it was excellent. Drinking and whatnot started early, as they should on the best holiday of the year. We were aiming for 2pm for the real eating to start, and with the help of roomie D, J, B-alicious, J-mama, S, D, E and el señor B, we came close enough. There were massive quantities of food. Massive. The pictures don't even start to illustrate the gluttony properly as all the food was not yet laid out when they were taken. So you'll just have to trust me: there was an amount of food that could only be described as obscene. J took enough pictures of roomie D and S carving the turkey that if you scroll through them fast enough on the still camera, it's almost a movie.

We ate.

And ate.

And ated some more.

We probably ated too much.

During the course of the weekend, A, R and L-bot all stopped by to sample our wares. Which fed us all, all weekend long. Luckily, the back porch stayed cold enough that we never really had to put away the food. It did make pilin' up a plate a bit chilly, though. There was much witnessing of the fitness (J-mama brought his velour track suit special for the occasion), printer jams, reality checks, don't give 'im the stick, and rollin' up of shit. There was also Heartthrob, and later dirty-customized Heartthrob, where we used pics of goth-D, the masturbation fairy, and various drivers licenses as our potential dates, and the ultimate question was not who we would go steady with - it was a little uncomfortable. There were backrub daisy chains, more eating, a trip to St. Vinnies, even more eating, some caburlesque and finally more eating.

It was, in short, the BESTEST THANKSGIVING EVER! Thanks to all who made it happen!

Photo captions:
(1) Modeling the lovely decorations my mother sent, whilst looking all hostess-y in my apron. (2) D & J-mama survey nibblies at table #1. (3) More food overflowing onto the counters. (4) J & roomie D at main table #2. (5) Roomie D and S rock that carcass out. (6) B-alicious, el señor B, E & S looking mighty full after the first round of dessert. (7) J-mama demonstrating his fullness to S and the camera.

*"Witness (1 hope)" - Roots Manuva

...ten-one-thousand...WALK AWAY!

aka St. Alton Brown's "Muffin Method". Works every time. You'd know, if you've ever been lucky enough to eat my muffins (snigger...I can't help it).

I'm posting again today because I hate writing. You heard (read) me right. Blogs aren't bad because style-wise I can write how I think or how I talk. I'm currently attempting to write an original educational research proposal for an academic job application and IT BLOWS HARD. I'm also posting this picture specifically in the hopes of causing a few of you, in on the joke, to giggle. You gotta hear the vocals that go with this action, or so I'm told. If you're one of the lucky bastards that can't remember my voice: it's high, nasally, LOUD, sharp, penetrating, sometimes squeaky, and most of all - annoying. Also fairly recognizable if you go blind at a party and need to seek me out in order to be directed towards the muffins.

Crooked spin can't come to rest*

Ah, so, my trip to Puerto Rico. It was warm. It was beautiful. So were all the people I met. It was perfect and it was what I needed. How do I sum it up beyond that? I can't really, I'm sorry. I could tell you little vignettes about the complete lack of road signs, crazy drivers, being lost all the time (which I'm okay with), sitting on the beach, reading on the beach, doing math puzzles on the beach (yes, yes, I'm a nerd), combing the beach for bits of sea-glass, feeling very relaxed, snorkeling, drinking, a bit of chuffing, getting only a little sunburnt, my lousy attempts at Spanish, eating fish and/or guava paste at every meal. But really, they'd be better told in person and I don't think I could get across in writing how much I love los puertorriqueños and their gorgeous island. So here are a couple pictures, all of the beach because 90% of my time was spent there. I'm even applying for a teaching job in Mayagüez, although I doubt I'll get a response. But if I do, y'all come visit, hear? Muchas gracias especialmente a C y su esposa por la cena y JJ y sus chichitos de oído por un día maravilloso.

*Elliott Smith - "Say Yes"